guard regional finals!

=]

We got 9^th out of 30 or so guards. Yeah we’re pretty cool and so not gangster.
so my weekend thus far… Saturday we went down to San Diego and preformed in semi-finals/prelims. We were in 2^nd place in our sub-division. In our whole division though we were in 9^th (since it’s so huge they divide it up so its easier to judge and stuff). So we came home and I hung out with people at my house cuz they were already there. And then we went and got my hair cut. Gasp. We took like 3 inches off which really made a difference. It looks so much thicker and kinda shorter now...imagine that huh. Aand Richard and I are losers to say the least. So then cuz we were in the top 15 of our division we got to go back to S.D. on Sunday to perform in finals. Yay? I woke up at 4:30 in the morning. So any happy feelings I had about making finals were gone when I figured out the call time was 6am. =/ I got to watch the sunrise in the parking lot though.

So then we drove down there and had an hour to kill. Our plan, dance party in the parking lot! Lol. It was so funny guards were arriving and we were partying out to blasting music from the car. It was a blast we took funny pictures and listened to rap, hip hop, spice girls, nsync, etc. then we warmed up, preformed, etc. then went out to lunch. On our way over there we had the windows rolled down, the music blasting and our arms waving out of the windows as well. And Taylor was catcalling to all the bicyclists. And we ate and hung out in that parking lot (we did a lot of that it seems). Then went back to watch four hours or so of guards…yay? Well it was fun to watch the world guards independent and scholastic. Arcadia is soooo crazy and slightly creepy. It’s like watching a horror movie.

And I still don’t get fantasia’s though it’s super coolly and Lauren is in it =)

So yeah.

Weekend was fun. Yay us. =) and now…im sleepy and I dun wanna do my essay or memorize lines for Lit or my math homework. =(

tomorrow-

my finals start.

im soooo dead haha. im only worried about math, gov, econ, aaannnddd.... -_- lit too i guess cuz i want my B to go up. what else is there, German? eh dont have to study for that. so pracitcally all my classes.

great.

TODAY

im 3 years old?! when did that happen? first baptism of 05 =)  now its 08 and im 3!

crazy how the time goes.

"Broken"

Broken-

       It’s all over the floor

       Sprayed across

                    The glass stands still

              Mischievous light dances upon it

                       Throwing laughter off the walls.

                  It laughs at me.

             I basked in shadow-

                                Relished His touch!

                                     And all my own-

                    I have suffered.

                         The boy doesn’t understand.

               How I stood- how I stand

                   Clutching my broken heart

                          Trying to keep the blood in

                               But still the life leaks,

                                      The glass to deep

                   Sobs rock my body,

                                      They quicken death;

                       He seems content to watch though,

                           Till I beg his gleaming smile to bite.

                    Bite! Upon my neck- take me now!

                                     I care not

                              He hates me so it matters not.

                           Nothing will-

                                                   Not ever more

                       No,

                                           I fear we have lost

                                   My heart and I

                        Soul left me long ago- the Glass did

                                             Away with the last of her.

                         The floor is to thin, when I fall I will crash-

                             So then I come down

                                                      Barreling past

                           Closing my ears to His wicked laugh

                 Trying not to picture his face.

                                     My arm flails and I gasp-

                                                 My heart frantic in panic

                 My eyes intake:

                            No glass, no Death

               Simply my forlorn room, my sheets knotted around me.

                                                     It was, simply and just- a dream

           But knowledge brings no relief.

                                        I still fear

                           He is still hunting

                                               I am still wanted.

=(

im so not happy.

seriously depressed.  its not me. and i HATE it.  im either ignoring it and trying to be happy or giving and crying, not eating, gorging, etc. none are good.

i wish i could launch into something logical about this all but right now, its not going to happen. it seems like this happens to me alot. well every few years. i loose a really close friend. some are harder than others. this times, its BAD. probably becuase their not moving its cutting all off ALL contact. i serisously think that stabbing me would be sooo much less work and cleaner too. i mean the knife goes in it comes out, and my blood spills all over the floor. sure it might stain but its nothing to emotinal pain. its really hard to clean that up. i mean you grab hold of it in one area then the other side starts to unravel and theres nothing you can do but watch becuase if you let go to grab that end, you have TWO ends falling apart. and THEN it mulitplies! geez.

bright side: i know there is a lesson for me to learn in this, i still have yet to figure it out after...what since i was 4 when i first moved? yeah as you can see its not quite sticking. God just needs to SPELL this out for me! it would be easier for both of us. in my opinion at least.

mmmm my hair looks redder... heck i dont know.

its almost midnight and my eyes hurt. gah!

we had to write poems for AP LIT. i like mine =) even though the form is normally used for love poems iiii used it for a dark stormy night when witches attack. =) becuase i was feeling more like witches and storms then love and such. if it started out love we would have a bloody heart break in the end annd im not sure my teacher would like that veiw so much. so we get witches. yay. ill put that up...eventually. ><;

so yes. bedtime for me.

i hope everyone's weekend/week was better than mine. sigh its only monday.